Important Life Lessons I Learned from a 13-Year-Old
Working from home with kids wasn’t something I planned to do this year. Many of us are adjusting to a different way of living, working, and parenting. I would like to share what I learned from a 13-year-old during this time. We discovered some simple but surprisingly powerful life hacks and tips to survive and thrive while distance learning, working from home, and social distancing.
Lesson 1: Prioritize Your Daily Work the Night Before
The night before, determine your most difficult tasks for the next day. Schedule those to complete first. Why? In the morning you are fresh and have a clearer mind. You will get through more difficult tasks or situations faster and more easily.
If you wait until later in the day or the evening to tackle harder challenges, it will take longer. Your mind may not be as sharp to solve the challenge quickly and most effectively. While this is true for a 13-year-old experiencing distance learning for the first time, the same is true for mom and dad working remotely.
Lesson 2: Remain Calm to Prevent Unwanted Escalation
We have all lost patience at some point with our children and each other. The antics of school-age children especially can push us to the brink. We want to scream – sometimes we do! As we shelter in place, this issue doesn’t get resolved but prolonged. Outbursts and reactions can occur especially when an entire household is both distance learning and working from home.
Outbursts can occur at anytime. Be prepared! When you want to scream, remind yourself first to step away from the situation. Count to three. Take a deep breath.
Second, gather your thoughts. When all have cooled down, develop a simple positive resolution and finally address the issue.
Lesson 3: Adjust Effectively For Better Communication and Greater Results
We didn’t ask to become each other’s teachers, students, and office mates. When we shelter at home, we cannot pick who we work with, and the same is true for children. You get what you get and you do not get upset.
We cannot determine our child’s personality. Are they naturally quick learners or slower to grasp? Are they socially outgoing or reserved?
My son has reinforced for me that the best strategy is to adjust your contact to support the person. If working with an innately quick learner — be it a child or employee — provide an independent environment for that person to grow, with minimal check-ins. Adapting your interactions will deliver the best results. Conversely, if a child or employee is slower to grasp concepts, review the work together. Engage in a discussion to ensure an understanding of what is expected and how to proceed. More frequent and positive contact may be required for better results.
Lesson 4: Exercise First Thing in the Morning or by Lunchtime at the Latest
Our family is trying to keep an exercise routine with videos from the gym teacher and low impact exercises. It’s been a great way to start getting back in shape, share a little family time, have a good laugh and get the day off to a good start.
I do find if it’s not done first thing, laziness sets in. Who is going to interrupt a child when they are concentrated on their studies later in the day?
Lesson 5: Laughter and Patience Are the Best Medicine For Almost Everything
Create fun! If you can slow down and count to three in almost any situation, you can find something to laugh about.
Have a simple pillow fight on the bed with your kids. If your child is trying to sneak in some screen time, make it an inside joke. The TV must be broken if it miraculously turns on while your child is doing schoolwork!
One night we asked Nana to join our family for dinner remotely via FaceTime. We had a lovely, meaningful dinner discussion — after we got a good laugh at Nana’s screaming loud TV as she struggled with the connection.
Then Nana outdid herself, successfully connecting with us during Zoom or phone meetings. All situations resolved in a hearty, healthy and family bonding laugh.
I hope our family’s tips for working from home help you and yours maintain some sanity.
If these tips can keep a 13-year-old productive, as well as mom and dad, they just might work for you.